How many times have you thought to yourself, “If only I were thin, I’d never have to think about my weight again?”  As if losing weight will magically make everything better, and you’ll never feel fat again.

If only that were true.

Weight and body is an ongoing process.  You’re never really done, as you’re led to think you'll be once you lose all your weight.  You know, that pie-in-the-sky moment when the stars align and you finally figure out why you’re fat?  You can definitely make monumental strides around losing weight, getting in shape and realizing overall better health, but to think one day it’s all over when it comes to maintaining the status quo is foolhardy.

It’s what I refer to as a setup, or in other words, you’re setting yourself up.  We’re so afraid to feel sometimes that we conjure up the trickiest ways to avoid it.  Case in point: Thinking that all you need to do is lose weight in order to never feel fat again.

[bctt tweet=”How you feel doesn’t come from your body. It comes from your head.”] Of course, losing weight makes you feel better about yourself.  Your jeans fit better, shopping for new clothes takes on a whole new nuance, but do you necessarily feel less fat?  Because if that’s all you’re looking for, you can feel that way right now. 

No waiting necessary.

If you’re used to feeling fat, and tell yourself you're fat when you look in the mirror, once you’re at your new weight, it's just as critical to change what you tell yourself (even before!) otherwise the feeling never goes away.  Binge eating, overeating or compulsive eating can all result in feeling fat too, including feeling guilty, because simply losing weight doesn’t always change how you eat.

Weight loss is typically only temporary too and only lasts until you get into argument with a friend, get laid off or your boyfriend breaks up with you, and you don’t have the emotional capacity to deal with any of it!

There are hundreds of people who are, by all standards, considered overweight, obese, or fat, but they don’t think so, or feel it.  So why do you?  And by contrast, there are plenty of women who are bone thin who think they need to lose weight, and therefore refer to themselves as fat or obese.

It’s a culture-driven obsession that leaves people feeling like complete failures, one way or another.

Emotional intelligence is an area of life few have mastered, yet it’s directly related to your ability to lose weight.  Not having any solid role models, I had to learn it on my own, and what a game-changer it was when I did. Changing how I interacted with people, how I interacted with myself, and how I interacted with my body was a major step up for me in life, especially with my weight.

People are conditioned to go right to what they’re eating when they want to lose weight, to which I cannot stress enough is the last place you should go!  While nutrition is important, it’s not the driver for emotional eaters.  Instead, obtaining or maintaining a feeling is, which is why ice cream is much more appealing.  It’s creamy, comforting, and tastes good, and to us, is way more exciting than broccoli.

Shows like Biggest Loser and Extreme Weight Loss do little to educate people on what they need to do to overcome emotional eating.  When people are truly struggling, they push them to exercise harder, stop eating so much and quit whining!  When deep down, their unresolved emotional pain is spearheading their ability to work out, or not, or give up chocolate.

For some people, exercise is a drug.  They can’t live without it.  They love to run, jump, dance, skip, or whatever else it may be.  And for some, it’s sheer drudgery.  They’d rather poke their eye out with an ice pick.

I’ve experienced both ends of the spectrum, and determined that exercising is completely dependent on my emotional state, right down to what I want to do and how much or how often.  I no longer put stipulations on myself about how to exercise, or how often, but rather, figure out what it is I want to do first, if anything.

My eating has stabilized too, in that, moment to moment, I’m fully aware of why I’m eating.  If I’m overeating, there’s a reason, and if I’m just eating eating, there’s a reason too. 

But that wasn’t easy.  It took a lot of self-reflection, willingness and life experience to understand why I ate when I wasn’t really hungry.

Having the courage to examine your emotional eating patterns and being willing to work on changing them when they’re not working is the only way you’re going to stop eating when you’re not hungry, and ultimately lose weight permanently.  It’s not because someone bullies you over it, or because you bully yourself.  It’s because you no longer feel the need to eat to soothe your feelings.

Unfortunately, there’s no light switch to turn emotional eating on and off though.  It requires a commitment to yourself, one that overrides any excuses, and a strong desire to do the work to change it.

Feelings come and go and can change in an instant, and for emotional eaters, that affects their eating habits too.  The crux of it all is thinking that being thin equals feeling thin.  I’ve been thin many times in my life, and didn’t feel it, and I’ve been overweight and felt thinner than I really was. 

Yet when you master the ability to simply feel, that’s when you truly start to get it.

You might love my free 7-video eCourrse on how to stop emotional eating too!  Just below to get it.

Love Always,
Angela Minelli

Angela Minelli is an author, speaker and founder of Angela Minelli International, a heart-based global business serving purpose-driven everyday women and entrepreneurs whose self-image and weight issues are inhibiting their confidence and blocking them from pursuing their life’s passion. 

Angela's joy is in taking a stand for women who are living less than ideal lives, stopped by fear and doubt, which prevents them from stepping into their innate power and delivering their God-given genius to the world. Her coaching programs and products are designed for women with busy lifestyles yet allow for powerful transformation to take place within a small segment of time.  

As a natural health practitioner and digestive health specialist, Angela specializes in helping people overcome weight and energy issues through holistic, non-invasive protocols that address the root cause of their conditions, including adrenal fatigue, candida, thyroid disorders, and more.  

Explore the ideals that are the cornerstone of her work at angelaminelli.com.